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PORTLAND, Ore. – Portland police said a man handed an apologetic robbery note to an employee at a FedEx Kinko's store, then waited for police to arrive. The store employee said that the note said, and I quote:"This is a robbery, I'll wait outside for the police, sorry."
Police Detective Mary Wheat said responding officers found the 46-year-old man outside the store Tuesday morning and took him into custody.
Wheat said no robbery charges will be pursued because the man did not have a weapon and didn't carry out a robbery. Police believe he simply wanted to go to jail.
Not only is this guy a major fucktard, he didn't even accomplish his goal, to go to jail. Why is that? He never committed a fucking crime!!!! This is a whole new level of criminal genius. I don't know what to expect next.
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